NPR

Lightning Fill In The Blank

All the news we couldn't fit anywhere else.

Copyright 2014 NPR. To see more, visit http://www.npr.org/.

Transcript

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Now, on to our final game, Lightning Fill in the Blank. Each of our players will have 60 seconds in which to answer as many fill in the blank questions as he or she can, each correct answer now worth two points. Carl, can you give us the scores?

CARL KASELL: We have a tie for first place, Peter. Luke Burbank and Paula Poundstone are tied for first, they both have three points each. And Firoozeh Dumas has two.

SAGAL: All right. So, let us begin with you, Firoozeh; you're in third place. You go first. The clock will start when I begin your first question. Fill in the blank. Because of his position on climate change, on Thursday, New York Mayor Michael Bloomberg endorsed blank for president.

FIROOZEH DUMAS: Obama.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Wednesday, China put forward a proposal designed to end the conflict in blank.

DUMAS: In Ohio.

SAGAL: No, in Syria.

(LAUGHTER)

(APPLAUSE)

LUKE BURBANK: I like your answer better.

SAGAL: Because of his actions during the Jerry Sandusky scandal, the former president of blank has now been charged with perjury.

DUMAS: Penn.

SAGAL: Yes, Penn State.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Because he refused to sign a letter apologizing for the failure of their new maps feature, an executive at blank was asked to resign.

DUMAS: Apple.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: The California DMV admitted that it gave a driver's license to a man who said on his application form that he was blank.

DUMAS: Blind.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Because of low ratings, it was announced this week that CNN host blank's daytime talk show will not be renewed.

DUMAS: Oh, Anderson Cooper.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Responding to a call from concerned residents, police in Iceland arrived at the scene of an abandoned property and broke up a blank.

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

DUMAS: Ice fight.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: No, a cat party. The headline in the Icelandic newspaper read: "Police Break Up Cat Party." Reading that, you think "cat party" must be a term for something else, something involving Snooki's porch, perhaps.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: But no, it was a party of actual cats. Police found two, possibly three cats at the scene, so even if it was a cat party it wasn't a particularly good cat party.

(LAUGHTER)

BURBANK: Ain't no party like a cat party 'cause a cat party don't stop. I mean that's common knowledge.

(LAUGHTER)

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: Carl, how did Firoozeh do on her very first ever fill in the blank?

KASELL: Firoozeh had five correct answers for ten more points. She now has 12 points and has the lead.

SAGAL: All right, well done.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: We've flipped a coin. Paula has elected to go third. So Luke, you're up next. Fill in the blank. Penguin Random House is the totally boring name of the new publisher created by the merger of blank and blank.

(LAUGHTER)

BURBANK: Penguin and Random House.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: To raise money for hurricane relief, a telethon featuring Bruce Springsteen, Bon Jovi and other musicians with strong ties to blank aired on Friday.

BURBANK: New Jersey.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week a Chinese government think tank urged the leaders there to end China's one blank policy.

BURBANK: Child.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Because of her appearances during Mayor Bloomberg's press conferences, Bloomberg's blank has developed her own fan base.

BURBANK: Sign language interpreter.

SAGAL: Yes, she's awesome.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: In the aftermath of Hurricane Sandy, Newark Mayor Cory Booker tweeted quote "I believe in you. I know this is a problem you can handle" to a person whose problem was blank.

BURBANK: Was running out of batteries on their Xbox.

SAGAL: No, almost, ran out of Hot Pockets.

BURBANK: Oh, I knew it.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: To defend his calculations, political pollster Nate Silver bet MSNBC's Joe Scarborough $2,000 that his predictions for blank are right.

BURBANK: The presidential election.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Three games on Tuesday night kicked off the start of the new blank season.

BURBANK: NBA.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Rock stars are known for having entourages, roadies and groupies, but this week we found out that Justin Bieber has a blank.

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

BURBANK: Personal wig assistant.

SAGAL: No, he has a tour hamster.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: You might have thought it was just an urban legend that Justin Bieber had a Tour Hamster, but no, it's true. The Canadian toddler has adopted a hamster into his entourage.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Making it the first time there's been a group with a hamster in it in which the hamster is not the cutest member.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: It's the perfect pet for him. Like Justin Bieber, the hamster is adorable, has thick, silky hair, and is prone to intersexual aggression and cannibalism.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: They have a lot to talk about. Carl, how did Luke do on our quiz?

KASELL: Luke had six correct answers for 12 more points. He now has 15 points, and Luke has taken the lead.

SAGAL: Very well done.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: All right then, so how many then does Paula need to win?

KASELL: Six to tie, seven to win outright.

SAGAL: All right, Paula, let's see if you can get that win streak going again. Here we go, Paula, this is for the game. In spite of the damage from Sandy, officials say that there are no plans to postpone Tuesday's blank.

PAULA POUNDSTONE: New York Marathon.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: No, Tuesday would be the election. The marathon is Sunday.

POUNDSTONE: Oh, sorry.

SAGAL: In the biggest gain in eight months, private companies added almost 160,000 new blanks in October.

POUNDSTONE: Customers. Jobs, jobs.

SAGAL: Jobs, yes, jobs.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week the Kremlin denied reports that Russian president blank was injured while hang gliding with cranes in September.

POUNDSTONE: Putin.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: When asked whether the San Francisco 49ers win Monday restored team confidence, Coach Jim Harbaw said blank.

POUNDSTONE: Yes, indeedy.

SAGAL: No, he said, "there was never a question there. That's just a lot of gobble, gobble turkey, just gobble, gobble, gobble turkey from jive turkey gobblers," unquote.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Because of the hurricane, on Monday, Jimmy Fallon and David Letterman did their shows without a blank.

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

POUNDSTONE: They did their shows without an audience.

SAGAL: That's right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Cineworld cinema in Nottingham, England has apologized to 25 families who attended a screening of "Madagascar 3" for accidentally blanking.

POUNDSTONE: Accidentally were poisoned by the popcorn.

SAGAL: No, they accidentally were shown "Paranormal Activity 4" instead.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Two minutes of the horror film was all it took to make the parents grab their screaming children and literally run from the theatres. Said one parent, "It was enough to scare them for life." The theatre gave them all refunds and invited them to a later showing of "Madagascar 3" which unfortunately, just traumatized the children more than "Paranormal Activity 4" had.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Carl, did Paula do well enough to win?

KASELL: Paula needed at least six to tie but Paula had only three correct answers.

(LAUGHTER)

KASELL: So, with 15 points, Luke Burbank is this week's champion.

SAGAL: Well done, Luke.

POUNDSTONE: All right, Luke.

(APPLAUSE)

(SOUNDBITE OF MUSIC) Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.

Most Popular