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Poem: Donald Trump's Cabinet Of Curiosities

President-elect Donald Trump's Chief of Staff Reince Priebus, left; Jason Miller, a senior adviser, second from left; Boris Epshteyn, a spokesman for Trump, fourth from left, and Michael Flynn, Trump's nominee for National Security adviser, fifth from left, listen as Trump speaks to members of the media on Thursday, Dec. 8, 2016. (Andrew Harnik/AP)
President-elect Donald Trump's Chief of Staff Reince Priebus, left; Jason Miller, a senior adviser, second from left; Boris Epshteyn, a spokesman for Trump, fourth from left, and Michael Flynn, Trump's nominee for National Security adviser, fifth from left, listen as Trump speaks to members of the media on Thursday, Dec. 8, 2016. (Andrew Harnik/AP)
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Editor's Note: The president-elect has chosen for top posts in his cabinet an unlikely band of candidates. Our poet of the political scene, Erika Fine, offers this handy, rhyming digest of the names Trump has put forth so far.


T R U M P’S  C A B I N E T  O F  C U R I O S I T I E S :  E x p e r t i s e,  P l e a s e !

For chicken coop security

Trump chose a clever fox.

For national posterity

He’s cast a baleful pox:

MICHAEL T. FLYNN (national security adviser)

The person who may guide us

Through a global terror threat

Retweets fake news that’s senseless,

Which he always fails to vet.

BETSY DeVOS (secretary of education)

The pick for education

Perhaps is not a fool

But neither has she set a toe

Inside a public school.

BEN CARSON (secretary of housing and urban development)

The man who may lead HUD

Is anti-public housing.

“The market is the better way”

Is what he’s been espousing.

ANDREW F. PUZDER (secretary of labor)

The nominee for labor

Thinks workers waste time eating.

He’d rather hire robots

To ensure that we’re competing.

NIKKI HALEY (ambassador to the United Nations)

With parents born abroad,

The choice for UN rep

Lacks other foreign know-how --

She’d better start to prep!

SCOTT PRUITT (Environmental Protection Agency)

The pick for EPA

Says “Climate change? No way!”

He’d rather frack and pray

That earthquakes stay away.

LINDA McMAHON (Small Business Administration)

Pro Wrestling is a world

With rules that are its own.

Kaboom, the new small business head

Could soon be overthrown!

RICK PERRY (secretary of energy)

If you disrespect

And cannot recollect

The group that you’ll direct,

There’s a major disconnect!

REX TILLERSON (secretary of state)

A pal of Putin’s plutocrats

Might be our rep abroad.

His email system needs to have

Encryption that’s unflawed!

STEVEN MNUCHIN (Treasury secretary)

A foreclosure king for Treasury

Won’t help to drain the swamp.

For him the Great Recession was

A moneymaking romp.

JEFF SESSIONS (attorney general)

His record is abysmal

On civil rights and race.

The nominee for new AG:

A national disgrace.

Erika Fine Cognoscenti contributor
Erika Fine is a freelance editor and writer.

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