Review: 'Zelda' spin-off 'Hyrule Warriors: Age of Imprisonment' is as brainless as it is cathartic

“Hyrule Warriors: Age of Imprisonment,” out Thursday, isn’t subtle. You hack. You slash. You endure predictable plotlines and admittedly splendid animation. I’ve never quite clicked with such “musou” fare before, but this game sweeps through my overtired mind like a cool breeze.

“The Legend of Zelda” games, particularly in their Nintendo Switch incarnations, earned acclaim through an open-ended melange of exploration, puzzle-solving and combat. “Hyrule Warriors” spinoff games abandon everything but the last part of that trifecta. They dial the action up to 11, sacrificing nearly everything thoughtful about the franchise on the altar of bombastic fights and dazzling special attacks.

The thing is, sometimes such fluff is all you have capacity for. As a new dad, “Age of Imprisonment” has slid into my sleep-deprived life far more smoothly than, say, the excellent but excruciating “Hollow Knight: Silksong.” I’m rarely able to game for more than half an hour at a time, so I’ve welcomed the four-to-20-minute battles of this latest “Hyrule Warriors.” But don’t expect it to deliver much story or surprise. It’s got more in common with the horde-smashing joys of “Vampire Survivors” than it does with the venerable series it’s spun off from.

“Age of Imprisonment” may as well be fan fiction. It follows Princess Zelda after she falls into the mythic past, fighting a Ganondorf that will later return to terrorize the Hyrule she came from. The early plot beats come straight out of memories you uncover in “Tears of the Kingdom,” but it doesn’t take long before the game introduces legions of new allies, from the familiar (Rauru and Mineru) to the novel (a Korok vagabond named Calamo and his suspiciously Link-shaped construct companion).

As with “Age of Calamity,” the “Hyrule Warriors” prequel to “Breath of the Wild,” the game fills gaps in the “Tears of the Kingdom” timeline that didn’t require patching. I don’t really need to know how the good guys imprisoned Ganondorf, just that they did after great struggle. Few of the game’s personalities rise above bland heroism. But to be fair, the dialogue’s not where the game shows off its boisterous character.

Look instead at how these warriors move and fight. Gorons like Argraston tuck and roll across the battlefield. Zora queen Qia literally swims through the air. Mineru side-saddles a one-wheeled motorcycle that tramples all enemies in her path. Her combos summon increasingly outlandish contraptions — from a spiky monster-truck-thing to a giant metal ball. Each of these 20 playable characters also has their own specials and team-ups, and I’ve yet to tire of their myriad animations over dozens of hours of gameplay.

At its default difficulty, “Age of Imprisonment” seldom poses a challenge. I’ve brought underleveled warriors into many battles, but only occasionally had to pause the action to scarf down a healing ration. That leads me to my biggest gripe with the game’s mechanics, one that it shares with “Tears of Kingdom”: its selection menu.

You can assign up to five items or unique attacks to their own buttons. These shortcuts allow you to easily and quickly match the right counter to the right enemy attack. But you’ll also want to use Zonai devices that exploit an adversary’s elemental weaknesses, which will likely have you pausing the game to cycle through a long line of options. If you're in two-player mode, you’ll also, annoyingly, pause your partner’s screen when you do so.

Such aggravations do not ultimately sink “Age of Imprisonment.” I’ll even admit to some grudging interest in the game’s story, which often presents eye-catching spectacles once you overcome its slow early chapters. While unavailable in a few exclusively single-player missions (frontloaded at the beginning), the game’s co-op is fluid and accommodating for new players. My wife and I have even played it one-handed while eating sandwiches!

So while “Age of Imprisonment” hardly approaches the greatness of “Tears of the Kingdom,” it offers a quick hit of nostalgia and a massive shot of adrenaline — a serviceable bargain for strung-out gamers like me.