Every Morning
I wake with wonder
and dive into the day
I grasp for my phone like a lifeline, a buoy,
I rise among the displaced dreams of yore
Supplanted plans, disrupted from the year
So distanced from all social life before

I set out on my way
To make snacks for three kids
because that's all I seem to do with them here all the damn day
And it's hard work.
'Cause it's heart work.
This is artwork.

I rise
Like the sap in the maple tree
knowing it's time to feed its budding branches.
Like seedlings struggling towards the light,
even though I need a baptism of magic waters to cure all that aches

I don my gowns and masks and gloves
Tend to the sick, the lost, the tired, the dead.
I say a prayer, talk to God
think of things I love:
Birds and flowers and books
dandelions, earthworms, mosses,
all those things I never thought
to love, or not enough.

I rise
even when the news of the day
makes me want to stay in bed
Even when the outlook is bleak:
I've not seen my eighth graders smile. Or smirk.
my neighbor cut down the massive oak
that shaded my yard,
My wife died alone In an skilled nursing facility bed.

Oh yes I mourn those we have lost
And the cost of human lives
But still I rise
Still ire eyes
Cry for those who are gone
Who have marched on
Still fire eyes
Burn for justice denied
Flame hot for truth

We rise
even when our spirits feel deflated
because this too shall be past
because we are made of stardust
I am A new breath in an older body
with A future to ponder.
I no longer take hugs for granted.
The music at church yesterday, with
full choir, was glorious.

I sing of loss and grief and hope,
Of joy and pain and memory,
Of yesterday and tomorrow.

I became best friends with my computer.
And learned something spectacular:
Disconnection has connected us more than ever.
The Zoom "LEAVE" button calls for me

So, I am easing out of this rabbit hole
I will find my equilibrium and my verve
Be who I am.
Lose 40 lbs and improve my mental health
meet every patient
as they are
and care for them
as best I can
Try to celebrate
The fact of my existence

Birds tweeting, wind blowing, leaves rustling. I notice it all now.
I like this new world.

Even though I'm in my nineties,
I have learned to love more
the old man across the hall
who has trouble with his eyes.
the touchy woman down the street

In this world of
Bad audio connections,
I have learned to listen
After such stillness,
Nothing's the same.

I rise on this new day
out of bed like a miracle.
I tie my own shoes.
I linger with a full
pot of Barry's Irish tea, each slurp
an act of contemplative prayer
I spend so many days watching my child grow
mourning dove pretends to be an owl,
a cardinal rides a slip of a limb, up and down.
What was simple is made extravagant.

So I lift my gaze
Forward, slowly
To hike up, not give up
To sing out, not cry out
to like who I am, even when, especially when, I stand alone.
return to my books to find support
to make the coffee.
to watch ducklings
drop to waterglory
following Mama hen
through fervent streams.

To fill each day, not miss one
to see the world full on.
to pace the house at midnight,
watching the moon wax and wane,
to live and love
to write
to work
to laugh
to share
to fight
To create a world of generosity
A world where we are inspired
To help each other in every moment

So rise, my friends, rise up
All one heart
Be the change
and when you wonder
How you will likely spend your life
With the time left to borrow
Know that
To fight is to be human, for times short or longer,
For through the struggle, we may hope to become stronger.