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Super Bowl Haiku XX

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Peyton's getting old, perhaps a career in poems, will be his future. (Justin Edmonds/Getty Images)
Peyton's getting old, perhaps a career in poems, will be his future. (Justin Edmonds/Getty Images)

Each winter since just after the dinosaurs stopped treading the earth, or trodding it, whatever it was they did, there has been the Super Bowl.

For the past 20 of those winters, to the dismay of poetry snobs, there has been Only A Game's Super Bowl Haiku.

And there still is, and in a sense, Super Bowl Haiku is growing. Now, don't worry. This year's edition is no longer than previous editions…but it features the work of more poets than ever.


First Team:

Snow on Mount Fuji
Perfection of nature's way
On field--not so much
--Tony O'Keeffe

Noisy Seahawks fans
May raise the roof, a ruckus,
Or Jimmy Hoffa.
--Bill Littlefield

[sidebar title="Through The Years" align="right"] Can't get enough Super Bowl Haiku? Listen to our poetic compilations from previous years. [/sidebar]Chris Christie points, shouts:
"Look, folks! Jersey! Super Bowl!
No bridge to see here."
--Bill Littlefield

Goodell and Putin
Big shots both, can only hope
For no snow…and snow.
--Bill Littlefield

Miami, Dallas,
New Orleans, Tampa, all hope
Outdoors doesn't work.
--Bill Littlefield

Washington sells pot.
And so does Colorado.
Smokin’ Superbowl!
--Todd

Odds? Okay, here's odds:
How about 4-1 that
Tebow's in an ad?
-- Bill Littlefield

Sad Patriot's fan
Seeks same February two
For crying in beer
--Nancy Marks

I-I-I, Matey
The Sea will swallow them up
Whomever they are!
--Scott Suma

It's the Super Bowl?
I do not get reception
From under my rock.
--Stacy Casson

Wilson leads Seahawks.
It says "Wilson" on the ball.
Wait. Does that seem right?
--Bill Littlefield

"So, Peyton Manning,
You want one more Super Bowl?
Done," cackles Old Scratch.
--Bill Littlefield

"Eight," says Wilson. "Six."
"Twenty one," he says, and "five!"
Kaepernick says "Fore!"
--Bill Littlefield

Seattle winless
No titles, no rings, respect
Elusive as rain
--Rob Emslie

Fans loving long pass,
Caught in long fingers… cringing
At what happens next.
--Bill Littlefield

Bow your heads in prayer.
Please dear Lord, we beseech thee.
No more Super Bowl.
--Frizbane Manley

Half-chewed wings. Beer drips.
Smears of seven-layer dip.
The La-Z-Boy squirms.
-- CW Hannenberg

Shrimp tails. Cocktail sauce.
Half-chewed wings with blue cheese dip.
Area rugs wince.
-- CW Hannenberg

Super Bowl Haiku?
Sounds like a dumb idea.
I’ll never do it.
--Koryn Dimock


Honorable Mention:

We had so many haiku submissions this year, we couldn't come close to including them all. Here's a few that just missed the final cut.

New York Super Bowl?
Not in this lifetime, buddy.
It's in New Jersey.
--Jersey Jim

It is the big day
A tremendous spectacle
Let it be over
--Susan Mariott

[sidebar title="Listener Submitted Haiku" align="right"] Submissions kept coming in long after our segment was finalized. Visit the submissions page to read them all. [/sidebar]Snowy Meadowlands.
A commissioner's nightmare?
Nah; sell some more gloves.
--Adam Smartschan

Mannings ride in high,
At noon, songbirds tweet, wait scream,
Then scavengers feast.
--Zamir Nestelbaum

Seattle? Denver?
Where are the New York Teams now?
Hoffa rolls over.
--Michele DiPalo-Williams

our cold quiet field
has heard no Omahas yet
but it will, I hope
--Paul Strickland

Superbowl advice
Plan to leave early for game
Traffic may be bad.
--Scott Suma

Are you kidding me?
A Super Bowl in Jersey?
Forget about it!
--David W. Frank

Manning will freeze up
People of Indy know this
We've seen it before
--Lot Turner

N Y C wheedles
N F L capitulates
Super Bowl's frigid
--Jeb

A tip for the game:
Winning is not everything.
Lombardi was wrong.
--Scott Suma

Ocean or mountain
Flowing, not inflexible
Water erodes stone
--Deb Robarge

Sherman big mouth smack
Deep inferiority
Compensates big time
--Rob Emslie

Superbowl. Winter.
Landry and Vince would be proud
Ice Bowl two point oh
--Kelvin Brooks

The temperature drops.
Scalpers will take a beating.
I LOVE YOU GOODELL!!!
--Kelvin Brooks

February? Whew!
We've got no time for football.
Give us more curling!
--Frizbane Manley

You want some trash talk?
None better than Broadway Joe.
“I guarantee it!”
--JAD

Just one thing matters
And it’s not the final score
Post game with Sherman
--JAD

Seattle Seahawks
versus the Denver Broncos.
Heh, heh. Hash marks, dude.
--muddydoggers

This segment aired on February 1, 2014.

Headshot of Bill Littlefield

Bill Littlefield Host, Only A Game
Bill Littlefield was the host of Only A Game from 1993 until 2018.

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