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We live within a world that's full of villains, rogues, and skunks,
But happily it's also where the Griner woman dunks.
You say you do not know of her? You have not heard her name?
I answer that you've no one but yourself that you can blame
If you've not followed Baylor's march past everyone they've played,
Proceeding undefeated, as at Number One they've stayed
From fall on into winter and from winter into spring...
And who can doubt that Brittney Griner very soon will bring
To Baylor's happy campus all the glory that accrues
To teams that win the tournament and also never lose?
In other years Connecticut has gone quite undefeated,
And this year no one has maintained that UConn is depleted,
Nor have their greatest current players stumbled, slipped or shrunk,
But can they sky like Griner can? And can those players dunk?
Is Griner some one-woman team? I'd have to answer, "Nope."
At Baylor she's assisted every day by Brooklyn Pope.
Two other teammates, Odyssey and Destiny, by name
Have also helped young Griner to achieve her present fame.
Gee, Odyssey and Destiny, and Griner, who's 6'8",
A kind of giant, anyway. Say, wouldn't it be great
If Homer wrote the story that the Baylor team is playing?
It didn't happen quite that way, I know, but I'm just saying…
The tournament's not over yet, and Baylor must defeat
A smattering of lesser teams to make their year complete.
But when the shouting's over, the confetti swept away,
Won't Baylor be the champion? Can anybody say
That it will play out otherwise, this odyssey they've made?
Their destiny has been to crush each luckless team they've played…
And leave opposing coaches clueless, beaten, in a funk,
As one after another they watch Brittney Griner dunk.
This program aired on March 22, 2012. The audio for this program is not available.
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