Prepare For The Curse Of Ragnar

The Minnesota Vikings have ceased to employ their mascot, Ragnar the Viking, who has allegedly been delighting fans for 21 years. Ragnar’s salary demands struck team management as unrealistic. Bill Littlefield, however, fears the Vikings front office may come to regret that decision.

He thundered to the field atop a Harley-sort of ride.
In pictures it appears his mouth is always open wide.
The fur of some dead animal — he wore it as a vest.
As mascots go, he was much more ferocious than the rest.
His helmet featured horns; his beard? It hung down to his waist.
He was a prime attraction at the games that he once graced.

They called him Ragnar, those who dared to even speak his name,
And fearsome was his countenance, and widespread was his fame,
At least among the Vikings fans who viewed him with delight,
While others ran from games into the Minnesota night,
Alarmed at Ragnar’s bellowing, his horns, his bike, his beard,
And found him less-than-charming, puzzling, maybe even weird.

Ragnar had been a presence when the Vikings played at home
For slightly north of 20 years, but no more will he roam
The TCF Bank Stadium, and now his horned hat
Will hang, quite useless, on a hook somewhere. So that is that.
For Ragnar wanted 20K a game to pull his stunt,
And those who run the Vikings figured it was time to punt.
“Get lost,” they told old Ragnar, “with your beard, your horns, your bike,
For 20,000 bucks a game? Forget it. Take a hike.”

It’s nearly 40 years since this club made the Super Bowl.
And now perhaps they’ll never reach that brave, illusive goal.
For now they’ve banished Ragnar, whom the fans have long adored,
The mascot who was horn-ed, draped in fur, and never bored,
And who can doubt their fortunes will turn quickly toward the worse?
By sending Ragnar home, the Vikes invited Ragnar’s curse.